How to Manage Anxiety as a High Performer (Without Overthinking Everything)
If you’ve read all the books, tried all the strategies, and still feel like anxiety has a grip on you—this podcast is for you.
High performers, leaders, and entrepreneurs often look like they have it all together.
But internally?
Overthinking. Pressure. Imposter syndrome. Exhaustion from carrying too much.
In this conversation from The Magnetic Leader Podcast, Lisa Jeffs sits down with social scientist and coach Felix Fischer to break down:
- Why anxiety doesn’t respond to logic alone
- What actually helps in the moment
- How high achievers unknowingly reinforce anxiety
- And how to retrain your brain using real, lived tools
LISTEN TO THE FULL PODCAST HERE
Why Traditional Anxiety Advice Doesn’t Work
One of the biggest frustrations for high performers is this:
You understand anxiety… but you still feel it.
Felix explains why:
“When your body is in fight, flight, or freeze, your ability to think logically decreases.”
So even if you know you’re safe… your nervous system doesn’t agree.
That’s why:
- Thinking harder doesn’t help
- Logic alone doesn’t calm anxiety
- And “just relax” advice falls flat
You can’t reason your way out of a state your body is driving.
The Real Root of Anxiety: Your Brain Is Working With Old Data
Anxiety isn’t random.
It’s patterned.
Your brain is constantly asking:
“Based on what I’ve experienced before… what should I prepare for now?”
Felix explains it simply:
“Your brain collects data. If it has enough negative experiences, it assumes danger—even when there isn’t any.”
That’s why:
- Social anxiety feels real even when nothing is happening
- Fear shows up in situations that are objectively safe
- And avoidance reinforces the cycle
Why Avoiding Anxiety Makes It Worse
Most people try to manage anxiety by avoiding what triggers it.
But that backfires.
“If you keep avoiding it, your brain confirms the fear is real.”
Instead, what actually works:
You need new data.
Lisa shares her own example:
- She had a fear of flying alone
- Avoided it for years—even turning down paid trips
- Finally took a small step (short flight)
- Repeated it
- Her brain updated: “This is safe.”
That’s how confidence is built.
Not through thinking.
Through experience.
The Confidence vs Anxiety Loop
Felix breaks this down clearly:
- No experience → no confidence
- No confidence → more anxiety
- More experience → more confidence
- More confidence → less anxiety
“Anything we haven’t done yet can feel scary because we don’t have data that we can handle it.”
This applies to:
- Public speaking
- Leadership
- Business decisions
- Relationships
How Anxiety Shows Up in High Performers
This part matters.
Because anxiety doesn’t always look like anxiety.
It often looks like:
- Overworking
- Perfectionism
- Procrastination
- Imposter syndrome
- Overthinking simple decisions
“You can be successful and still struggle internally every day.”
And often:
The more successful someone is… the more internal pressure they carry.
Why Imposter Syndrome Isn’t About Skill
There’s a dangerous belief floating around:
“If you were actually good, you wouldn’t feel like an imposter.”
That’s not true.
Felix explains:
“Imposter syndrome isn’t connected to your actual skill level. It’s conditioning.”
It often comes from earlier experiences like:
- Feeling “not good enough” despite effort
- Being judged or overlooked
- Internalizing failure without context
So no matter how much you achieve…
Your brain defaults back to:
“It’s still not enough.”
What to Do in the Moment of Anxiety
When you’re in it—spiraling, overthinking, stuck in your head—this is where most people get it wrong.
They try to:
- Think harder
- Push through
- Force productivity
Instead, Felix suggests:
1. Start with calm awareness
“This is happening. It’s okay.”
Stop adding panic about the anxiety.
2. Get out of your head and into your body
Because:
“You won’t think your way out of overthinking.”
Try:
- Going for a walk
- Listening to music
- Breathing slowly
- Changing your environment
Even simple shifts reset your nervous system.
3. Stop trying to solve imaginary problems
“You’re trying to solve something that isn’t happening.”
This is key.
Anxiety pulls you into future scenarios that don’t exist.
The work is to come back to:
Right now.
Why Feeling Your Emotions Reduces Anxiety
This is one of the most powerful parts of the conversation.
Most people suppress anxiety.
But suppression doesn’t remove it.
Felix explains it like this:
“It’s like pushing a bottle underwater. The moment you let go—it shoots back up.”
Suppressed emotions:
- Stay in the body
- Drain your energy
- Build pressure over time
Eventually → they explode.
A Simple Practice That Actually Works
Instead of suppressing anxiety:
Feel it.
Lisa shares:
“When I started allowing myself to feel it, my anxiety dropped from an 8 to a 2.”
Try this:
- Lie down
- Close your eyes
- Notice what’s happening in your body
You’ll often realize:
The sensation isn’t as overwhelming as the story around it.
The Truth Most People Miss About Anxiety
This is one of those things that sounds simple but actually changes how you see everything once it really lands, which is that you’re never going to fully understand someone else’s anxiety, even if you’ve gone through anxiety yourself or something that looks similar on the surface, because everyone’s nervous system is wired a little differently and shaped by completely different experiences.
So what feels manageable or even small to you can feel genuinely overwhelming to someone else, and the moment we forget that or try to make it make sense through our own lens, we usually end up minimizing it without meaning to, which just makes the other person feel more alone or misunderstood. When in reality the most helpful thing you can do isn’t to fix it or explain it away, it’s just to meet them where they are and let them feel seen in it.
“I may not understand, but I’m here.”
Where to Start If You’re Struggling With Anxiety
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by it, the first thing is honestly to stop trying to fix the whole thing at once, because that’s usually what keeps it going—you start thinking you need to figure it all out, get to the root, solve it properly, and it just pulls you deeper into your head.
A better place to start is just getting a feel for your own patterns, like what actually sets it off, when it tends to show up, and what you usually do when it hits, because most of the time it’s happening so automatically that you don’t even realize how consistent it actually is until you slow down enough to see it.
From there, it’s less about judging yourself or trying to shut it down and more about catching it in real time and being like, okay… this is happening again, and even just that shift—without spiraling about it or making it mean something about you—starts to change your relationship with it a bit.
Then just take one step, whatever feels doable in that moment, not the perfect move, not the thing that fixes everything, just something small that moves you even slightly out of the loop you’re in.
And somewhere in all of that, it’s really important to remember that this isn’t just you, even if it feels that way sometimes, and it’s not permanent, even if it’s been there for a long time.
Final Thought
At a certain point, it’s just not about needing more information or another strategy or trying to push yourself harder to finally get it right, because you can understand all of this and still find yourself right back in your head, overthinking the same things in the same way.
What actually starts to change things is when you begin having different experiences, when your body starts to feel a little safer, when you’re able to catch a thought and not immediately run with it or build a whole story around it without even realizing you’re doing it.
Your mind is going to say a lot of things, especially when you’re stressed or under pressure, and some of it will feel very real in the moment, but that doesn’t mean it’s true or useful or something you need to keep engaging with.
And even just seeing that, even slightly, can give you a bit of space back that you didn’t have before. If this resonated, explore more at lisajeffs.com and listen to The Magnetic Leader Podcast for deeper conversations like this.
