How we cut ourselves off from abundance is a topic that I’m asked about often as a life coach and intuitive consultant for entrepreneurs. Abundance can be defined in many ways, but for the purposes of this article, let’s say it means having more than enough of what you need and desire. So how do we cut ourselves off from abundance?
There are many ways, but here are some common ones:
- Worrying about the future and not living in the present
- Not trusting that the universe will provide for you
- Living your life according to limiting beliefs (often passed down from generations)
- Constantly comparing yourself to others
- Living with fear, scarcity mindset, and lack of self-confidence
I’m going to go deeper into these 5 with some practical steps to open up to all the abundance available to you, but first, think about…
How many times have you been in a situation where you’ve caught yourself saying “I can’t afford that” or “I don’t have enough time/money for that”? If you’re like most people, it’s probably more times than you can count. And each time you say it, you’re not only reaffirming your current reality, but you’re also cutting yourselves off from the unlimited possibilities out there for you.
The thing is, abundance isn’t just about having more money or stuff. It’s about having more of everything – more love, more joy, more opportunities, and more experiences. When you focus on what you lack, that’s all you’ll ever see. But when you open yourself up to abundance, suddenly there’s so much more to life than what you thought was possible.
Before becoming a life coach I had an interesting abundance journey. Growing up in the ’80s, my Father’s large-scale commercial construction business was doing great. Perhaps not as great as our neighbors with the sweet red convertible porche ;). But good enough that I felt safe and secure around money. We went on nice vacations. Had a pool and often got the cool new electronics that came out every 3 to 5 years… got to love the release times of the 80s!
Fast forward to the 90’s when the recession hit. Commercial construction got hit pretty hard. And that’s when my nervous system became acutely aware of the fear and panic that can come with a scarcity belief system.
A dentist appointment where I needed some extra work done, and had to see my mom’s face of worry and stress when they told her the total… will be forever etched in my mind. No blame my Mother as she was doing the best she knew how. The awareness of that time certainly wasn’t what it is now. But what I took from that brief experience… was that I wasn’t worthy of nice things or experiences. It’s funny how our young minds can misconstrue situations like these and develop limiting beliefs.
This one belief took me years to reprogram. I’m thankful I did, as a do enjoy a nice weekend away at the lux spa.
MESSAGE FOR THE PARENTS:
I believe one of the best things you can do for your kids is to instill in them an abundance mindset. Our children do not need our faulty, distorted money beliefs. And yes that even means kicking to the curb the famous saying “Money doesn’t grow on trees”.
PS. This isn’t coming from me sitting on my soap box of perfected parenting. It’s coming from my 9 years as a life coach, coaching people from all different backgrounds, professions, and money stories.
Far too many people are moving through their life, holding themselves back because of the myth of scarcity.
Scarcity has been a long-held myth that many of us cling to. It is an old notion that tells us that there is not enough out there for everyone; we must “fight” for what is limited. This can create feelings of anxiety and lack.
We’re taught from an early age to strive for a certain standard of living based on accumulated assets and limited resources, leading us to miss out on the abundant meaning in our lives.
However, when we learn to allow ourselves permission to create and build outside the false parameters of scarcity, we open up new possibilities that redefine how we live and work. Life and work become one of creating, expressing, and loving.
Believe it or not, a scarcity mindset doesn’t discriminate. You may think those who are considered the top 1% don’t have to battle a belief system around lack, limitation, and separation. A common misconception even I had until I spoke to a number who were terrified of losing what they had accumulated.
I don’t believe this is why we’re here. In fact, I know it’s not, deep in my soul. Yes, it may be part of our experience. But I don’t believe we as divine souls living a human experience would choose to come here to experience a lifetime of lack, limitation, and separation.
We’re here to create, to express our divine gifts. To love and be loved… and to have fun doing it. We can’t have these things in perpetual survival mode. But we can, and will when we tap into the true abundant meaning of life.
Alright, we can’t change what we aren’t aware of, so let’s dive into the 5 common ways as a life coach I see powerful individuals cut themselves off from abundance and what we can do about it.
1. Worrying about the future and not living in the present
Now you might think I mean the future as in years, maybe many years into the future. Retirement if that floats your boat or perhaps our golden years.
But I’m actually referring to the constant state of worrying. Such as where the next clients will come from or if you’ll have enough for XYZ.
Let’s switch topics to love. Have you ever known anyone to split from their partner and immediately be scared they’ll never meet anyone else.
What about someone who’s still in a relationship they know isn’t a good fit but they stay because they’re afraid they’ll never meet and connect with anyone else… let me add… in a world of about 8 billion people.
This is a perfect example of a lack and limitation mindset. This type of worry is sucking the joy and abundance available to you, so let’s stop it, shall we?
YOUR PRACTICAL STEP
One of the most effective ways to overcome this type of scarcity mindset is to practice gratitude and self-compassion. Practicing gratitude, like keeping a gratitude journal helps us realize how much we have in our lives right now, shifting our focus away from what we think we are lacking. Self-compassion, which can be as simple as taking a few moments of stillness to just be with yourself. Can help you recognize that your needs and wants matter, allowing you to see that you don’t need to settle for less than you desire… just because you think there is a limited amount to go around. That’s simply a limited belief.
2. Not trusting that the universe will provide for you
This is the most common one I hear as a life coach and Intuitive consultant.
“I’ve been trying to manifest this, but it’s not here… where is it?”
The doubt that creeps in is often the culprit that keeps your frequency at the same baseline thus keeping your experience relatively the same.
This is also what keeps people bouncing around from course to course, coach to coach, intuitive to intuitive… always thinking the next one is the magic answer. But really the magic answer is just more TRUST. Having more trust that the universe will provide for you will allow you to continually raise your frequency and shift the experiences you are allowing in.
YOUR PRACTICAL STEP
Think about trusting as a muscle. You can absolutely build your trust muscle step by step. Here’s how you can start:
Take a few moments to recognize the abundance of your life… Make a list of everything you already have in abundance… such as your clothes… food in your fridge… water from your tap… electricity in your home… or even the air you can breathe easily. Then make a second list of all the times you can remember that the universe came through even at the last minute. Be intentional about adding to this list the times you have enough for what you need and want. Keep this list where you can see it daily for a minimum of 30 days.
3. Living your life according to limiting beliefs (often passed down from generations)
Our parents’ beliefs and attitudes towards money, success, and life are often absorbed by us as we grow up, and those beliefs can shape our own ideas of what is possible for us. Unfortunately, these limiting beliefs can prevent us from achieving the level of abundance that’s available to us if we don’t learn to recognize them and break free.
Limiting beliefs are formed by the collective experiences of our family members, especially our parents. When parents experience lack or scarcity in their lives, they often pass down those worldviews to their children. They also limit what they believe is possible for themselves and their families, which then gets absorbed by their kids as TRUTH about their own potential in life. This process often happens unconsciously; it’s not that our parents are trying to keep us from experiencing abundance in our lives—it’s just the way things have been passed down from generation to generation.
As adults, it’s important that we take a step back and examine the beliefs around money and success that we adopted as children. It’s natural to want to honor the values of our parents while still recognizing that those values may be holding us back from achieving greater levels of abundance in life. At some point we must choose where our loyalty lies… in the past or our future.
YOUR PRACTICAL STEP
The first step in breaking free from any limiting belief is to become aware of it. Start paying attention to any thoughts you have about money, wealth, success, or anything else related to abundance that sounds like something your parents might have said or believed about themselves growing up. Write them down.
Once you’ve identified a belief that isn’t serving you anymore (such as “Money doesn’t grow on trees”), try reframing it into an empowering thought such as “I deserve all the abundance I can create with my gifts and talents”). With practice, this reframing process will help you shift out of old patterns of thinking that no longer serve you and into new ones that will help you allow in a greater level of abundance. As a life coach, I’ve seen this is one of the practices that can create the most impactful change.
4. Constantly comparing yourself to others
This is a big one that can have a detrimental effect on the abundance you are allowing in for yourself.
It’s easy to feel inadequate when you compare yourself to others—especially when you see people who seem to have it all together. It can make you feel like you’re lagging behind, that your life isn’t as glamorous or successful as theirs. This can lead to feelings of envy, frustration, and even depression—all of which can keep you stuck feeling less than.
Comparing yourself to others can have a huge impact on your self-worth. When we compare ourselves to other people and feel like we don’t measure up, our self-esteem takes a hit. This can lead us down a path towards negative thinking and behaviors that are ultimately destructive rather than constructive.
Comparison often leads us down a path of competition instead of collaboration—and competition often leads to scarcity rather than abundance. Competition leads us down a rabbit hole that pits us against each other instead of working together for mutual gain. It keeps us focused on what we don’t have rather than what we do have.
We stop feeling grateful for what we have achieved and can start feeling as though we are lacking in areas. This does nothing but attract more lack.
YOUR PRACTICAL STEP
If you find yourself comparing yourself to others, try reframing it into an opportunity for collaboration. Instead of thinking “they have more than me”, focus on what you can learn from them and see their abundance as a sign it is available to you too!
Additionally, try to cultivate more gratitude for all that you do have. Take note of the things in your life that are going well and be thankful for those successes. Acknowledge the wins, even small ones. This will help ensure that you stay focused on what is working rather than focusing on the areas you believe are lacking.
5. Living with fear, scarcity mindset, and lack of self-confidence
Fear and lack of self-confidence can be two major blocks to abundance in our lives. Fear leads us to close off opportunities before we have even had a chance to fully explore them, while lack of self-confidence keeps us from taking risks that could potentially lead to greater abundance.
When we are operating from a scarcity mindset, we are so focused on the lack of resources in our lives that we can’t see the opportunities for abundance that are all around us. We don’t have faith that there is enough for everybody, so we close off the possibility for growth and expansion before it has even had a chance to manifest itself.
Living with fear also makes us overly cautious and can keep us from taking action on the things we really want. Fear keeps us stuck in our comfort zone, which may be a great place to hang out for a while but not somewhere you should stay permanently. As you can’t grow and welcome in new levels of abundance if always in your comfort zone.
YOUR PRACTICAL STEP
To move away from fear, scarcity and lack of confidence, we must identify the underlying beliefs that create those limitations. We often create barriers that stop our growth and development by believing in stories about ourselves or our circumstances that don’t actually hold true. Each time you encounter a fear or a scarcity mindset, take a moment to pause and ask yourself “is this belief serving me? Is this helping me move closer to my goals or further away?” Then, adjust your behavior towards what you want to believe.
If you are feeling fear and lack of self-confidence around abundance and it’s been three months or longer, it might be time to invest in a life coach. Life coaches are great at helping you identify your fears, develop strategies for overcoming them, and build confidence that will help you move forward and manifest the abundance you seek.
They can also help you focus on gratitude for what is going well in your life rather than being consumed by fear of potential losses.
Abundance is an inside job—so it’s important to focus on gratitude, what you want to create, and take action in spite of fear.
Abundance is available to us all, it’s our natural birthright. It’s just a matter of clearing the resistance to receive it and allowing it in.
The bottom line is that living with an abundance mindset isn’t always easy, but it starts with being grateful for what you have and trusting that there is enough out there for everyone. You don’t need to create abundance, your job is to allow it in and believe you are worthy of it!
If you need support or want to expedite to journey to living with an abundance mindset consider hiring a professional such as Lisa Jeffs Toronto Life Coach. Book a no-obligation call and see if intuitive life coaching is your next best step.